What’s the real reason brides end up doing all the wedding planning?
What has made weddings off limits to grooms?
You’d think that Ibiza weddings would be completely different and immune to stereotypes. That adding a modern twist to things and coming away to somewhere so beautiful would ensure a non-conventional wedding.
Don’t get me wrong, what you see at an Ibiza Wedding is personal, fun and incredibly special. The suppliers on the island have made it their passion to create unique and amazing experiences. However, the day you see before you has usually been chosen by the bride, the groom has had almost no input.
And how do I know this? Because I’ve heard 100s of speeches. Grooms and groomsmen who stand up, thank the bride and admit to all round chuckling that they’ve had zero input into this wedding and worse, little interest…
But is that because they want it that way? Do brides become instantly overbearing as soon as a wedding is mentioned? Or is it our own beliefs that exclude men from the scene? Read on to find out!
Most brides plan their wedding, but do they have to?
I turned to the internet to find out.
And I found some pretty interesting info there.
All of these quotes can be found on this Reddit Thread
It is still obviously a big day for the Bride, but I've said things I want to happen and I think it's only fair if both are planning the event
“I (groom) hate how men just step back and do nothing, or give no input. It’s not hard to help plan something that’s for both of you. I also hate when I say what I’ve done and I get the “omg wowww, that’s so good you’re helping”….I’m like….it should be expected I help….
I also dislike how it’s viewed as “the wife’s day” when I’ve helped out a lot. I get some input on what I would like to happen on that day.
I also see a lot on social media about “my husband seeing all my hard work come together on our wedding day!”, which reinforces this stereotype that the groom isn’t involved.
“My partner wanted the big wedding. At each venue we toured they would talk directly to me and I’d point and say “talk to him, it’s his vision.”
My fiance has been involved in every conversation with every vendor as it’s our day and he wants it to represent both of us.
info@ibizaphotography.com
As I scrolled down I kept reading more and more of the same… It’s other people that assume a wedding is all about the bride, even though the groom would like to take an interest it’s seen as weird. So he doesn’t.
I then searched “should a groom be involved in planning a wedding”
The results were mixed but the same theme kept emerging. According to this prominent article
“As the groom, one of your main responsibilities is to make sure your [partner] feels appreciated for all [their] hard work during the wedding planning,
This doesn’t sound much like teamwork to me!
Should Brides Plan Their Weddings. The Last Word
My brief excursion into this topic has surprised me. I, like a lot of other people, had just assumed that grooms had no interest in this subject. From reading the many many posts on forums, I don’t think this is the case. The fellas seem to have been side-lined before they can even express an opinion.
And then there’s the overwhelm. When 1 person feels like it all should fall to them simply because they’re a bride, that can be a bit much. I now have the impression that grooms want to be involved, that they’d like to support their partners and that the wedding is something they’d like to know more about. Makes sense!
So I say if you’re planning an Ibiza Wedding and want to make it special and unique to both of you, then both of you plan it. There’s already so much to think of and organise, it makes sense to share the load. This is an amazing day in one of the world’s most beautiful places, you should both enjoy it!
Thank you so much for stopping by and reading my article! If you’re a bride, or a groom planning an Ibiza Wedding then you might want to have a peek at my 5 Favourite Ibiza Wedding Venues
Or you can get in touch any time at info@ibizaphotography.com